Loneliness

Loneliness

Self-Portrait
 
Sunless morn
two cups of tea
Loneliness pours one on its own.
 
The month of November
Loneliness drops from above
Snow shower!
 
I make eggs 
whisk well, and pour in a hot pan
Loneliness coagulates.
 
I go out for a run
Loneliness follows
Sometimes I win, sometimes, you guess'd right, that one.
 
I make curry
Chop, chop, stir, stir
Spicy spicy Loneliness.
 
I begin to clean and broom
Smart loneliness!
Escapes my old vacuum.
 
We go out for a get-together
Jokes are shared, silly ones
We laugh, Loneliness laughs harder.
 
I plant a seed
Loneliness flowers
within three weeks.
 
I begin to paint
Behind every structure a shadow quaint
Loneliness.
 
I drive to the mall
Loneliness races with me
Totally uncalled.
 
Family time
warmth flows
Loneliness sulks.
 
You kiss me
the sweetest nectar
I look around, nowhere to be found
Loneliness.
 
But I know very well
it is a keeper
Not a betrayer
Loneliness.
 
(How does one feel migrating to a new country/culture/world? Part of the diaspora, this poem is my jottings of the experience. Of migrating from India to Canada)
 
The sketch is done with pencil on a  9″x11″ hot pressed paper. Never did a self portrait ever. I found it too narcissistic. If there is any such thing as that. Too, I mean. I wanted to do some artwork with this autobiographical poem and could come up with nothing better than a self portrait. In my defense most of the other artistic activities are self-congratulatory. So I thought why not? I almost scratched my head while filling in hair. How quirky is that? How deeply can one be aware of drawing one's own self? At the same time, mostly, when I was unaware, it just felt like drawing the 'other'.The sketch is not up to the mark, which poses the question of how faithfully can we do self portrayal in the first place?
 
 

4 thoughts on “Loneliness

  1. Wonderful Manjit…you bring out the essence of lonliness. You words resonate as if they are mine. This lonliness could be common grounds settling in a new country. Self potrait is quiet a reflection of you.

    1. Yes Deepta, it takes time, quite a bit of time before you begin to feel at-home here. Reaching out to another lonely heart helps for sure. But a hole does remain even so. Thanks so much for reading. About the sketch, thank you, but I do think I look way leaner in the sketch. If dreams were horses πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

  2. lovely …………….

    I plant a seed

    Loneliness flowers

    within three weeks….

     

    superb poem…thoughts expressed so very neatly and sweetly…..
    anu

     

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